I'm too fat to get medical insurance, apparently.

I haven't had medical insurance since I turned 21 and was dropped from my grandparents coverage. I've needed it, but by the time my part time job offered medical coverage to me I left that job. For medical reasons. I've been suffering from depression and a lot of physical pain problems for years and I had finally figured out a way to get medical insurance even though I don't have the money. My grandmother gave me the money she had saved for me for college, to pay for one year of medical through Kaiser.

 So, I applied and I was denied. The reason?

"Your  height/weight is outside of the acceptable guidelines for a healthy body mass index."

According to BMI I am nearly morbidly obese. Everyone who knows me insists that I am not fat, maybe curvy, or chubby, but not fat and certainly not obese. I've had problems with my weight for as long as I can remember. I've always thought I was fat. I hated my body and how I look. Recently I was starting to feel a little bit better about how I look, though I was still nowhere near happy with it. Getting denied because of my weight... has certainly not helped me feel better about myself.

Morbidly Obese? =/ 

Recently I finally decided to finally decided its time to get help for my depression, and anxiety issues. Even though it terrifies me I know I need to see someone about it and getting medical insurance was the first step. Now, I don't know where to go from here. Most of my family refuses to acknowledge that I need help, or that anything is wrong. I don't know who to turn to anymore.

I decided to start writing about everything just as a way to keep myself from going crazy... I need some way to let out what I'm thinking/feeling and I really don't have anyone to talk to.